Hi there,

I think it’s very brave and very mature of you, that you can acknowledge that you have a problem and that you’d like some help with it.  I didn’t have the courage to fully acknowledge and embrace my mental health problems until 21 years old and I wish I had earlier!

Being 14 puts you in a tricky situation because you are still very dependent on your parents for their support. It might be helpful to find out why your parents are against you seeking some help for yourself. Are they worried that being diagnosed with depression might become a self fulfilling prophecy or that you might be misdiagnosed medication? Are they worried about stigma affecting you or their family? Is there something strange and inappropriate going on at home?

I think a lot of people worry about assumptions they’ve made about Counselling or Psychology that aren’t so much based on fact. Firstly, if you are strongly against being prescribed antidepressants or other types of medications then a Psychiatrist, Psychologist or Doctor can’t force you to take them. Secondly, mental health is to be kept confidential, so you shouldn’t have to worry about other people knowing unless you tell them. Thirdly, Psychiatrists/Psychologists are very reluctant to diagnose people under 18 with a Personality Disorder partly so that the diagnosis doesn’t become a self fulfilling prophecy. There is an exception to these ethical rules, though. And, the exception is if there is violence or sexual abuse going on at home *CURRENTLY or if you are CURRENTLY at a high risk of suicide (eg, you have the plans in motion to kill yourself - which I hope you don’t).

*If these things occurred in the past and are not affecting you currently then it can be a breach in confidentiality for a Psychologist to talk with anyone other than yourself about the problems you are experiencing and they can receive serious penalties for doing so.

Whatever the case, I think you have every right to seek help and treatment for your well being both physically (cold, broken leg) and mentally (depression, anxiety). Some ideas that might help you are:

Ringing a helpline. In some countries a kids helpline or underage helpline is free of charge and profession counselors can talk with you on the phone and offer the next best thing from a face-to-face Psychological Therapy Appointment. The beauty of this is that you don’t have to say your name and calling from a phone perhaps might be something that is accessible for you.

You could see your local Doctor and talk about how you think you might be depressed right after you’ve talked about your cold or whatever else you’re seeing the Doctor for. GP’s are often pretty good at picking up on mental problems and they can actually prescribe anti depressants if really necessary and give some good help and advice.

You could see your School Counselor if you have one in your school. I think that would be the best option (if possible)!

 Best wishes and I hope things look up for you soon :)